Butt Baby From Santa: An Alpha Omega Mpreg Christmas Romance Satire Read online

  I laugh and step closer, making sure he’s comfortable as he gets upright. “You want to keep piping your cookies with my knot in your ass?”

  He shrugs. “We’re both done, so I might as well get these done. Then we can start decorating the tree.”

  “Fine.” I lean over his back and grab a cookie. “But I want my mistletoe kiss to be on my dick.”

  JD laughs and the vibration creates a surge of pleasure on my softening cock. “My pleasure, alpha. I’ve always wanted to give a blow job under mistletoe.”

  I roll my hips against him, making him shiver and sigh from the sensation inside his ass. “In that case, you’ll be giving me a lot more than that tonight.”

  “Gladly.” JD stands up fully and leans against my chest, resting in my favorite position when my knot is inside him. “Merry Christmas Eve, Phoenix.”

  “Merry Christmas Eve, little omega.”

  5

  JD

  Christmas Eve has never been quite so...emptying. I don’t know what’s gotten into Phoenix but he fucks me until I can barely walk and then he tucks me into the middle our huge bed. He left me alone to take care of a few things, but I can hear him mumbling as if he’s talking to someone out there. If I weren’t so sleepy, I might be curious enough to go check on him. But whatever he’s doing doesn’t matter.

  What does matter is that I’m warm and cozy. And when I open my eyes next, it’ll be Christmas morning, and I can surprise my alpha with the gift of a lifetime.

  I bounce in and out of REM sleep for most of the night, but when an overwhelming pine scent fills the house my eyes snap open and I sit upright in bed. “What’s that smell?”

  “Hmm?” Phoenix curls his arm around my waist and tries to nudge me back down. “Nothing. Go back to sleep.”

  The scent is getting stronger, and I wonder if a bottle of Pine-Sol has exploded somewhere. “No, babe. Get up. I think a jar spilled or something. And do you hear...jingle bells?”

  “Maybe Santa’s here.” His eyes are still closed for about a second until Phoenix fully wakes up. “Oh, shit. Hold on. I need to check on something.” He runs out of the room completely naked and goes into the guest room.

  Curious, I follow him out to the hall. “What’s going on?”

  Phoenix appears a moment later with a confused expression. “Nothing in there. But yeah, I do smell something.”

  He walks into the family room with me on his heels. “It’s like the Christmas tree farm we…” The words die on my tongue when we see a naked man sitting in front of our Christmas tree.

  He’s got a big red bow wrapped around his dick and a santa hat on his head. “Thought you guys would sleep forever…”

  “Are you?” Phoenix reaches out to help the man up. “Santa?”

  The guy laughs as he allows Phoenix to pull him into a standing position. “No, no, no. I’m an elf. An elfa elf, in fact.” He pulls Phoenix’s hand to his lips and gives him a soft kiss. “My name is Austin, but some people call me Aiden. Or Jill.” He turns to me before I can ask about his name, and he takes my hand too. “Santa sent me.”

  “He did?” I step closer, instantly attracted to the beautiful man in front of us. “Why?”

  Austin turns to Phoenix and raises an eyebrow. “Do you want to tell him or shall I?”

  “Tell me what?” I step between the two naked men, just realizing I’m as naked as they are. Normally, I’d be cold out here without any clothes on but the heat emanating from these alphas...or this alpha and an elfa...warms me to my core. “What is he talking about, Phoenix?”

  Phoenix places his palms on my cheeks and kisses the tip of my nose. “I asked Santa to bring us a Christmas miracle. I was thinking of a baby, but I guess he figured a little fun time might be a good distraction.”

  Austin steps against my back and brushes his nose against the inside of my neck while he inhales me. “A very good distraction, indeed.”

  My eyes flutter shut as I enjoy the feeling of the strong body behind me. He’s closer to my age than Phoenix and is built like an underwear model. Who knew Santa had such hot play things up at the North Pole. It’s no wonder he only leaves one night a year.

  Phoenix kisses my mouth and then slides his lips across my jaw until they meet up with Austin’s. “This might be the best gift Santa has ever brought me.”

  Austin nudges me with his erection then wraps his arms around both me and Phoenix. “I’m not the whole present. I brought a bag full of goodies.”

  “Goodies?” I glance back under the tree and see a big red bag. “Like what?”

  “Well, let’s see.” Austin reaches into the bag and pulls out a giant candy cane. “Oh, this is a good one.” He drops to his knees and sucks my semi-hard dick into his mouth.

  “What are you…” I know what he’s doing with his mouth, and it’s wonderful, but on closer inspection of the candy cane, I see that both ends are shaped like dildos. “Is that…”

  Austin winks then slips the hooked end of the candy cane into my ass. “It is.”

  My body quakes with a sudden icy cold blast that fills me. It’s like a peppermint icicle in my ass, and it’s amazing. “But what about the other end?”

  “Oh, Phoenix…” Austin pulls off my cock and then sucks the long end of the candy cane dildo into his throat. “I’ve got a surprise for you.”

  “Can we, uh.” Phoenix’s eyes are wide as he looks at the fat, candy-striped, ass toy. “Go to the bedroom?”

  “Sure thing.” Austin grabs the red bag and carefully holds the candy cane in place while walking me to the bedroom. “We’ve got a lot of toys to try out before morning.”

  “Why do you have sex toys? Does Santa make these too?” I carefully climb onto the bed on my hands and knees.

  “Actually, these are a bit of a side project for me. I have my own workshop back home that I dabble in the more unique toys.” He turns to me and gently swats my thigh. “DJ, ass in the air.”

  The long end of the candy cane rests on my spine as Austin positions Phoenix above me so the end of the toy is positioned at his opening. “That’s it, boys. I need you both nice and loose for me.”

  When Phoenix and I are both impaled on the thick rods as far as they’ll go, Austin flips a switch and they begin to vibrate, creating an intense sensation deep in my balls. I want to come, but I want this night to last as long as possible.

  Austin suddenly appears in front of me and feeds me his thick cock. It’s sweet and delicious with a bit of a pine smell that explains the scent that woke us up. It was him all along. “Suck my stick, baby.”

  I swallow him until his smooth balls are against my chin, then I hum against him.

  “Fuck yeah, baby.” Austin gently fucks my face, easing his thick across my tongue. I can feel the ridges and veins pulsing as I wrap my fist around my cock. “Just like that.”

  He maneuvers Phoenix, so he can suck his dick while my throat milks him until he’s ready to shoot. I hollow out my cheeks and suck as hard as I can. I’m rewarded with a mouthful of...eggnog? I swallow the load and look up at Austin.

  “I’m not done, baby.” His fingers twist in my hair and he gently thrusts in and out of my mouth, leaving a thick deposit of his cream with each pass. “I hope you’re thirsty.”

  “Mmm.” I swallow every drop, licking his tip after he finally pulls out. “That’s yummy.”

  Austin winks and tickles the underside of Phoenix’s balls until he explodes. “Our alpha is pretty yummy too.”

  Our alpha? That’s a strange thing for an elfa elf to say on a one-night stand, but the sentiment is hot enough to make me come on the comforter with the taste of elf still on my tongue.

  6

  Phoenix

  Why didn’t I write to Santa sooner?

  This is the greatest night of my life, and it only started twenty minutes ago.

  While JD and I kiss and cuddle for a few minutes to recover, Austin licks every errant drop of come from our bodies, including those still forming a
t the ends of cocks. “Ready for round two?”

  “Almost.” What I want to say is “Hell, no!” but I really do want to taste him. According to JD, his dick is sweet and his come is even sweeter. I’ve always had a sweet tooth and my current craving is for the sexy elf teasing my balls with his pointy ears. “Don’t you need a minute too?”

  Austin just chuckles. “Not at all. I’m like ten people in one. It’s true for most elfa males. We just keep going and going, our production almost unending...as if we have a limitless supply of seed pouring through our veins.”

  I raise an eyebrow, somewhat confused by what he’s talking about but it’s not the first time his riddles have confounded me. That’s okay. Santa didn’t send him for his conversation skills. “So, what else is in that bag of yours?”

  Austin looks like he’s just remembered it’s Christmas morning. “Oh, I’ve got ear rings.” He looks between me and JD. “But I guess you guys don’t need those. Those only work on elves.”

  “What’s an ear ring?” JD rolls over and rests his head on his palm, his cock already starting to fill up.

  Austin wiggles the tips of his pointy ears and grins. “I’ll show you.” He pulls out some gold chains with round clamps at the ends and holds them for us to see. “My ear tips are an erogenous zone. Kinda like human nipples. With these clamps, my ecstasy is heightened during an orgasm but also during sex. It’s comparable to an omega in heat.”

  “Damn.” JD tentatively reaches for a clamp and tests the sharp edge with his finger. “Does it hurt?”

  “Kinda.” Austin shrugs and attaches one clamp to the tip of his left ear. “But in a really good way.”

  As soon as the first clamp is attached, Austin’s dick plumps up three times it’s limp size. He’s bigger than he was earlier and I can only assume the ear teasing has something to do with it.

  “Can I get a taste of that now?” I lean forward and lick the tip of his cock.

  “Of course.” Austin arches his back so I have better access, running his hand up and down my back. “But I want to come inside JD’s ass this time.”

  His fingers massage my scalp as I slowly suck up and down his length.

  “That sounds good.” JD reaches for my cock and lazily plays with it, dragging a finger up and around the head then back under my sac. “I want that creamy goodness inside me.”

  “It’s all yours.” Austin lets me have another few seconds with his dick in my mouth before pulling out and laying back on the bed. “JD, baby. Climb on top of me.”

  JD obeys, climbing into Austin’s lap and lowering himself onto that huge rod of sweetness.

  Austin takes a deep breath as if cherishing the moment before digging his fingers into JD’s hips and thrusting up into him. “Fuck, you’re so tight for me, baby.”

  JD leans against me with a smile on his face. “I’m not sure if I’ve been on Santa’s nice or naughty list, but thank you for my present.”

  I brush a kiss across his lips, capturing his warm skin gently between my teeth before kissing him more passionately. “I want you to have everything, little omega. Whether I’m the one to give it to you or not.”

  “Bring that dick over here, Phoenix.” JD grabs my cock and tugs toward his head.

  I follow his motion, not wanting to injure my favorite part of my body. “You are a bossy elf, aren’t you?”

  Austin just chuckles. “Elfas always are. But yes, when it comes to pleasing and being pleased, I’m not afraid to ask for what I want.”

  “I know what I want.” JD is bouncing hard on Austin’s dick, riding him like a thoroughbred in the Kentucky Derby. “I want your knot.”

  A low grumble that sounds like a purr comes from Austin’s throat. “I don’t knot, baby. I bow.”

  7

  JD

  “Bow?” A full-body shiver quakes through me and a puddle of come collects at the tip of my dick.

  “That’s right.” Austin’s ears wiggle and he reaches for the chain hanging between the two clamps. When he yanks on it, his eyes roll back and his cock seems to thicken even more. “I’m just about there.”

  If he didn’t warn me, I might have been scared. But since I’m expecting the bow...my climax is just more intense when I feel the strange lateral movement of Austin’s big elfa cock inside me. I can almost trace the movement as he seems to twist and turn at angles almost unheard of in nature.

  But he’s not from nature. Well, at least not the nature I’m familiar with. Austin is from the North Pole and they obviously do things different out there.

  What isn’t all that different is the warmth that comes from having Austin’s creamy delicious seed swirling around inside me. I love how full it makes me feel.

  Almost like I’m wrapped in a warm hug.

  Then I realize I am wrapped in a warm hug. It’s scorching, actually, sandwiched between two big men who are making out above me.

  Austin is sitting up and Phoenix is leaning across my body with his tongue buried inside Austin’s mouth. I’m just coming back out of my come-coma when the strange feeling of Austin’s moving cock rocks through me again, and I know we’re no longer tied together.

  At least not by his cock.

  By my heart is a different story.

  It’s only been a few hours since Austin showed up under our Christmas Tree, but I already know I love him. It’s soon and maybe a little crazy...but when you know you know.

  I stare up into Austin’s eyes and wait for him to look back at me. “You’re staying with us, right?”

  He sighs and forces a sad smile. “I wish I could, JD. But Santa needs me back at the workshop. I’m only here until midnight, but I can request time to visit during the summer when things are pretty slow.”

  Phoenix wraps his arm around my back and drops a kiss on my head. “I know, baby. I’ll miss him too.”

  “But I’m leaving you with something that will remind me of you.” Austin slowly slips out of my channel and nestles me against his chest so I’m facing Phoenix.

  I think for a minute about hints Phoenix has been giving and wonder what else was on his letter to Santa. “A puppy?”

  “Fuck!” Phoenix bounces off the bed and runs down the hall. “I totally forgot.”

  The scent hits me minutes before Phoenix walks into the bedroom with a little puppy in his arms. A wet puppy. “This is for you, my sweet omega. He needed a quick bath but he’s all yours to name and train and love.”

  I reach for the little brown bundle of fur. “I do love him! Can we name him Christmas Cocoa?”

  “Of course we can.” Phoenix has a proud smile as he hands me the damp pup. “But maybe Chris for short?”

  “Perfect.” I kiss his neck and rub my scent all over him so he knows who to love the most. “Thank you, alpha.”

  “How about we hydrate and get some food in our stomachs?” Austin stands up and stretches, rendering both Phoenix and I speechless by how beautiful he is. “Then we can come back in here for the next round.”

  My ass is already protesting the extensive abuse it’s endured over the past twenty-four hours, but I definitely want more. Especially if we don’t have a lifetime with Austin. Begrudging, I get out of bed and reach for some sweats. “I’ll make pancakes.”

  “I’ll take Chris outside. I don’t want him to get used to using those stupid piddle pads.” Phoenix picks up the little furball and carries him out to the back to explore the yard.

  “How are you feeling?” Austin looks at me with a serious expression, like he’s concerned for my life and well-being. “Anything different yet?”

  I take a quick inventory of my parts and everything feels fine. “I’m fine. But what do you mean by different?”

  “You know, different.” His wide hand spreads across my belly and he seems to be focusing on something. “Pregnant.”

  My jaw drops and I look down. Sure enough, there’s a slight bulge where my baby will be growing. “But how…”

  He winks and kisses the tip of my nose.
“That sweet nectar of mine isn’t just to provide you with a protein shake. It’s dosed in Santa’s magic. You’re already the equivalent of two months pregnant. By New Years Day, you should have a precious new baby in your arms.”

  My knees go weak and I drop to the floor, unable to comprehend what Austin has just said. Could it be true? Is that even possible? I would say it’s not possible...but none of this seems real.

  Austin drops to the floor beside me and pulls me into his lap. His dick is hard and accidentally slides into me, but it feels so good that I don’t bother trying to get off him. I need to feel him close to me right now as I process everything he’s just revealed to me.

  A few minutes later, Phoenix comes back in and finds us like that on the floor. “What’s wrong?” He kneels in front of me and notices my hard dick sticking straight up then he smirks. “Oh, you guys couldn’t even make it out of the room before starting up again?”

  A slow smile spreads across my cheeks as a single tear drips from my eyelid. “I’m pregnant. Some kinda accelerated elf sperm is already growing and developing inside me. We’ll have a baby in a week.”

  Phoenix’s jaw is slack as his eyes shift between mine and Austin’s. “Seriously? That’s possible?”

  Austin lifts me up a few inches by my hips and then slowly thrusts into me. “Santa can make anything possible. And this is what he wanted for you. A butt baby of your very own.”

  8

  Phoenix

  For the next several hours, we snack, fuck and nap. It’s the perfect way to celebrate Christmas.

  When dinner rolls around, I suggest we all go to the new vegan steakhouse downtown. The steaks are all plant-based but they taste like real animals. It’s my favorite spot for a romantic dinner with my omega.

  “Will Chris be okay here without us?” JD has the puppy curled up on his chest as he leans on the sofa with his feet propped up. “I hate to leave him.”